So since this blog is named for me. It features my talents, my children, my family simply my everything. I feel the need to share a fear I have right now. Early this morning around 2:40 am I finished editing my book. Now for those of you who followed my previous blog or who follow my Youtube channels. You know I finished writing my book July 2014 (I started in Feb 2014). Now this book is the first fiction book I’ve written for young adults. Its a short story and soon will lead to a sequel. Do I think it’s good? Well honestly the story line is good I guess I’m not sure if I executed it the way I meant too. I know, negative Nancy! Most writers are. This is the year I told myself to just take a leap on faith and deal with the outcome later.
Just a back ground on my writing and when I started. I have been writing short short stories, poems and plays at 7-8 years old. It was my way of escaping my painful childhood. However, those stories, plays and poems are locked away in a box. No! I never let anyone read them. Except one which I sent off to a writing contest and it was published in a book. I was like 15 years old.
Anyway, with that being said. I have finished my short fiction novel. For all practical purposes it is ready to be published. I should be happy right? Well when I penned the last sentence, doubts started forming in my mind. I went over the last paragraph like 5 times. Re-writing and re-writing, only to find that the last sentence I wrote I was satisfied with. So send it off to be published you say? I can’t, I just want to lock it away with all the other short stories, poems and plays from my childhood. Case in point I have 4 children’s books that I wrote in 2006-2007 that have yet to be published. In part because of illustration and part due to lack of confidence in myself and my work.
This is my downfall…..